All your Xmas presents have been opened, and you have not even gotten that perennial staple of seasonal items, new socks – allow on your own any other new clothing. That may well be just as you like it. Possibly you’ve got produced it abundantly very clear to your closest and dearest that present certificates are the finest way to steer clear of disappointment.
But in accordance to Norwegian folklore, a lack of sartorial renovation at yuletide sets you up for all varieties of mayhem and mischief. The outcomes of a no-new-clothing Xmas vary tremendously, based on the area where by this sort of an eventuality happens. None of them, on the other hand, are really constructive. As this map reveals.
Some punishments are fairly delicate. On component of the island of Smøla and in a handful of communities scattered together the Norwegian coast, you will have to kiss the church’s bell-ringer (light-weight brown). In a handful of other coastal locations, an spot in south central Norway and one more on the Swedish border (light-weight blue), you have to sit on the doorstep. And in an spot all around Oppheim and one more a single further inland (light-weight green), you will have to expend some time on your own in the barn.
In two massive locations in southeastern and mid Norway, you will have to sit (or experience) on a tree stump, although in a tiny spot in surrounded by stump-sitting territory, but also a greater spot in the south, in close proximity to Stavanger (purple), you have to pull all around that stump (or a sack) all around. In a tiny spot on the southern coast, seems to be Spangereid and environs (pink), you get called a ‘Christmas hobo’. And in a handful of tiny locations scattered across Norway (black), other revellers will steer clear of you. Like the Xmas hobo you are.
Even worse issues materialize in Vest-Agder county (brown), where by you change into a Xmas troll, and in and all around Bergen, where by your transmogrify into a byting (a changeling, or a idiot). In the northern component of Hedmark county, you won’t get any older – which could be a good matter (if you continue being younger endlessly) or a poor matter (if you die).
Some time-appropriate implications contain what seems to be Norway’s favourite Xmas animals – not reindeer, but goats and rams.
In two individual locations in southern Norway (in yellow), you have to experience the Xmas goat. In locations all around Eidsfjord and Geirangerfjord and in south central Norway (orange), you will be taken by the Xmas goat. And just north of the northernmost yellow spot, in an spot that looks to span equally Oppland and Buskerud counties (purple), you will be – pardon my Norwegian – shat on by the Xmas goat.
In the southern component of the Salten district, south of the Saltenfjord (olive green), you will only have to go through becoming called a ‘dirty ram’ in the course of Xmas. All over the Boknafjorden in southern Norway, such as Stavanger (red), you will have to carry a ram’s horn. As you will in a handful of isolated islands off the central coast (burgundy), only ‘up your arse’.
This is hoping you at least bought a scarf, or some gloves.
Map identified in this article on Imgur.
Unusual Maps #877
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